I read a story this morning on this eve of Christmas.  It was written by my cousin Bruce. Story

After reading this story, I thought about how I’d spent the early part of my morning,  focusing on my dear friend, Cathy, who is no longer here and how much I missed her.  That, of course, lead to missing my Mom & Dad (Harvey), who have passed.  Thinking of those loved ones lost gave me this feeling of being alone.  From there I thought about how I’d be alone on Christmas as my children would be with their father.  Funny how one depressing thought leads to another.  I spoke with my daughter, Erika, on the phone.  I mentioned being alone on Christmas and how I might go and see a movie we had planned to see a few days later together when she came down to see me and how she really wanted to see it with me, both of us for the first time.  I realized, then and there,  that I was having my own little pity party, focusing on this whole “woe is me” thing.

Getting back to Bruce’s story and his message, which is what this whole holiday season is about; the value of those we love and spreading that love around and of course, gratitude for all we have.  Crazy how one’s focus can change so quickly from thinking about what was missing to thinking about the great time I had yesterday, visiting my Dad (Chuck) and his wife, Pat, my brother, Bruce, his girlfriend, Joan and Pat’s kids, Laurie and Ted.  I spent the day laughing and sharing stories and in the evening we all went to dinner, where we ate great food, laughed even more and just had a great time.  That “alone” feeling just disappeared.

Why is is so easy to sometimes go to that dark place, see our glass as half empty instead of half full?   I really love my “half full” feeling as opposed to the other.  My body feels better, my mind feels better and stress goes away.  It’s really a better place for me and I’m sure, for everyone.

Hopefully, all of you will take time to focus on what’s good in your life this season.  Take time to say “I love you” to those special people and give big hugs and spread smiles.  And if, by chance, that noise in your brain goes to the dark place, try not to give it power and for Pete’s sake, don’t stay there too long!

Love and Light!!

LC

The optimist sees the rose and not its thorns; the pessimist stares at the thorns, oblivious of the rose

– Kahlil Gibran

As I approach this year’s Thanksgiving feast at my Gennine and Bobby’s home, my thoughts turn towards all that I’m blessed with.  While the food (and it’s abundance) are definitely on my mind (I am making pumpkin pies this year), it’s not about what I don’t have or haven’t achieved, but what I DO have;

My children and granddaughters, my friends and family, my knitting buddies, my football Sundays, my creative projects, my readers, my home, my crazy cat, and my health are just a few.  There are so many more.  My gratitude for all I have brings so much meaning to my life.

I’d like to share this email I received from my cousin, Janie.  It pretty much says it all.

Say thank you, until you mean it!

 Thank God, life, and the universe for everyone and everything sent your way!

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity! It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. It turns problems into gifts, failures into successes, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. It can turn an existence into a real life, and disconnected situations into important and beneficial lessons. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.

Gratitude makes things right!

Gratitude turns negative energy into positive energy. There is no situation or circumstance so small or large that it is not susceptible to gratitude’s power. We can start with who we are and what we have TODAY, apply gratitude, then let it work its magic.

Say thank you until you mean it! If you say it long enough, you will believe it!

Today, I will shine the transforming light of gratitude on all the circumstances of my life!!

~ The Language of Letting Go ~

Melody Beattie

I wish you all a very wonderful Thanksgiving filled with love, joy and laughter!  Oh, and Thank you!

“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” 
― Epicurus

This was written on October 26, 2012, one year anniversary of Cathy’s passing. 

I can’t believe an entire year has gone by since I lost my dear friend, Cathy. While her passing was untimely, unexpected, unnecessary and unfounded, I believe we all have our time here and then move on.  This last year has been so surreal.  It still feels like I can pick up the phone and call her or text her;  NO, scratch that; she hated texting; always said it was impersonal.  Well, I can’t do either, but I still find myself talking to her and drawn to those precious items around my home that she gave me.

I spent yesterday at the memorial park where her ashes were buried.  In the Jewish tradition it is customary to come back in one year for the stone unveiling.  It’s very important for us to never forget those who have moved on.  With prayers and the comfort of others who also feel our loss, we don’t feel so alone.

Cathy’s brother lead the small service with all the love in his heart he holds for his sister.  He told us why he was wearing a white T-shirt with piano keys on it and jeans.  He said, “Cathy, I know what you’d say to me.  You’d tell me I look like SHIT!”  We laughed and we cried and we felt all emotions release.  All of us were connected through the love we carry for her.   More tears came when I heard her son speak.  He’s in his mid thirties now and I thought back to the day she gave birth to him, for I was with her.  I shared so much of her life.

When her stone was uncovered, I thought back a few weeks when I was visiting.  I removed some overgrown grass that was covering both her mother’s stone and her place-holding stone.

Instead of flowers, we put stones on the grave.  Stones are permanent like the stones of ancient temples and they are placed to keep that part of the soul that remains at peace.  They also tell those who come to visit after us, that they are not alone; that others share their thoughts and prayers.

When I feel Cathy’s presence now, it is pure light.  (How fitting that the picture above shows my cousin’s tattoo).  That is how I see her.  She is radiant and happy, her make up is perfect and every hair is in place and she knows we miss her.  She still has her sarcasm when I converse with her and sends love to all of us who are close.

So, dear friend, I’ll be back to visit real soon, drop off a stone, say hello to you and my family.  In the meantime, I’ll talk to you from here as well.  We will be together again and go dancing.  You can drive.  I love you.

Adiós por ahora

Can miles truly separate you from friends…. If you want to be with someone you love, aren’t you already there?  ~Richard Bach

I’m not outspoken when it comes to politics.  I’m basically a listener.  I take it all in;  the debates, opinions of others,  how I perceive the issues and carry hope that whoever is leading our country will do his best to make my life easier, keep peace and insure our basic rights of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

I believe that all political parties believe this as well but just have different views on how to get there.  It’s like we are all want to go to Disneyland but want to take a different freeway.  I try to keep focused on my basic beliefs and shy away from the drama and turmoil that seem to overtake the news media and my friends who get all riled up in a heated political arguments, or what they call “discussions.”  I don’t see how this does anyone any good.  I don’t care who thinks who won the debate or what the polls say from one minute to the next.  To me it’s all unnecessary hoopla.

My Grandpa Marty on the other hand was what my mother used to call “A STAUNCH REPUBLICAN.”  He was different than I as he was very  ”out-there” with his opinions and if you didn’t agree with him, he got mad.  What he did have though, was a great love for our country that rested deep in his heart.  He was a man who came from little means, quit school early to help his family, moved to California and started up his business.  He was a man of honor and truth.

I think it’s appropriate at this time to share another side of my dear grandfather with you.  As always, his humor prevails.

 ARMCHAIR GENERAL

I am an armchair general

to this my friends agree;

why I could win this war

but they just give me sympathy.

My plans are very definite

uncomplicated~clear;

instead of letting them shoot me

I’d get them from the rear.

First I’d invite Adolph here

and then make him obey~

the rules and regulations

given us by O.P.A.

And as for Tojo, I would fix

a bowl of rice and fish;

and let him slowly starve to death

while looking at his favorite dish.

We’ve got to win this war

because of fellows just like me;

who rant and rave and misbehave

yet have their liberty.

 A fool and his money are soon elected. 
Will Rogers

I talk a lot about how years fly by, about the people who have influenced me and about those who I love, whether they are here now or have passed.

One of those people is/was my grandfather, Martin Steinberg.  You might ask why this man was so special and while there were so many reasons, the main one was that I learned about love from this man.

He was born in Maywood, Illinois on August 11, 1900.  I loved that he was born this year because it was always easy to figure out how old he was.  His family life was not an easy one.  He was raised on a farm and the only male child who lived.  In fact, his mother, Sophie, had 7 children and only his sister, Elsie and he survived.  They did not have indoor plumbing and were very poor so he had to quit school in the 8th grade and go to work.  Years passed and he worked small jobs, met my grandmother and married her in 1928.  Shortly thereafter, they had their first daughter, Annette.   He went to work for his father-in-law during the height of the depression so when things got tight, his in-laws made it very uncomfortable for him.  Apparently, they did not want to share with the son-in-law.  He had heard of great opportunities in California so left his wife, Gertrude and child, Annette, to come out West.  As soon as he was settled, they came by train to join him in his new life.  He bought a bunch of chickens with what little money he had and sold them.  That was the beginning of his business which later became known as the Florence Poultry Market.  It was located on the corner of Florence and Compton Avenues in Los Angeles (South, Central, home of the Watt’s Riots).  He was known as “Pops” and when someone couldn’t pay for food, he just gave it to them.  He always said he’d rather be owed money than to owe someone.  He was truly a great man and I have plenty more stories about him but I wanted to just give you a small intro into his life.

So~ I learned about love from him.  He didn’t sit down and lecture me about love.  I was simply an observer.  I observed the way he loved my grandmother.  He wrote poems to her and poems about life and poems about even his surgeries later in his life.  I have never known a man to love someone the way he loved her.  I remember she had very expensive taste in clothes and when asked how he could afford to keep her happy, he would simply say, “well, if she spends more than I have, I’ll just have to make more.”

So, without further adieu…..

GRATEFUL FOR YOU, GERT

If I could fly up in a plane

with my feet on this ground

or take an ocean voyage with

no fear of being drowned

If I could go to Vegas and then place a little bet

and actually beat them, Gosh!

This hasn’t happened yet!

In fact all my predictions will

just never work out right;

If someone lit a match for me

I’d fail to see the light.

Ideas I get by the score

and some of them are great,

but someone else thinks of them first

as usual, I’m late.

To all of my associates

sincere apologies;

the forest always blocks my view

when I should see the trees.

At this point, Gertrude, Darling

I must once again confess

that you deserve the credit for

our profound happiness.

Such idiotic things I’ve done

and still am apt to do

but God forgave me all of them

the day he gave me you.

“Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” 
― Robert A. Heinlein

Since we crafters love our tools, I thought I’d begin a series on why I really love to use them.  I’m beginning with The Crop-A-Dial which is manufactured by We R Memory Keepers.  I purchased mine quite a few years ago and after owning several other hole punch/eyelet setters, this is by far, the one I constantly have at hand.

It has 2 sizes of hole punches, 1/8 (which is standard eyelet size) and 3/16 (good ribbon size).  The setter has a dial that rotates so that you can set pretty much any size eyelet or snap.  There is also a little ruler on the whole punch so if you want a bunch of holes lined up along the side of a paper, there is a guide that will allow you to have them all the same width from the edge.  I have the original tool, but there is one available that has a longer reach so you can punch and set in the middle of a 12 x 12 page.  I rarely do that so the smaller one is just fine for me.

This tool is so easy to use.  I love it’s strength and power and the ease at which you can punch and set.  It easily punches through some metals like tin.  I remember the days of the hammer and metal setter and how I had to keep a really good eye on my thumb.  No worries with this one.  The cushioned handles just squeeze together and voila! The job is done.

Since I make a lot of books, I sometimes need to punch through very heavy book board.  An old fashioned setter just won’t cut it.  The Crop-A-Dial makes these heavy duty jobs just effortless.

You can purchase this tool on Amazon or run over to Joannes.  There are a ton of online stores that carry this tool.  Prices range from $20-$30.00.  The set I bought came with around 400 large eyelets in an array of different metallics.

There you have it.  My first favorite tool.  So?  What are you waiting for?  Shouldn’t you be making something?

BTW…

I do NOT recommend this for nose piercing. Have fun, people.  You will love this tool!

“I’m not a craft supply hoarder, I’m a craft supply enthusiast!”

I hope you are all fine and dandy this morning.  I’m trying to get over a huge loss in Fantasy Football, but that’s another story.  Instead of dwelling on the negative, I’d like to share a recent project with you.

I was given a project to do a banner for a bridal shower and had so much fun designing it, picking out the papers and finding those finishing touches that I decided to offer banners along with my Calligraphy, custom archiving and other fun things I do.

I figured that banners would be great, not only for special occasions like weddings, baby showers and kid’s birthdays, but would also make great room decor for your little one’s secret hideaway. I have a wide array of themes on hand and if I don’t, I can always create something unique.

Here is one I just completed for a Pirate Birthday. It was so much fun picking out the papers for this one. A last minute thought to add a black, red and gold glitter to the border added to the Pirate-y (not a real word) feel to it, don’t you think?

With the help of my many die cut machines and the fabulous collection of papers I have on hand, it makes my custom banners, a piece of cake or in this case, a treasure chest of jewels.

Here is a closer look that show off the details.

“Life’s pretty good, and why wouldn’t it be? I’m a pirate, after all. “
Johnny Depp

I took a break for a few weeks.  I turned the big 60 in the process.  It’s so hard to believe I’ve lived all these years.  They have gone by in a flash.

In these last few weeks I’ve spent some of my time sitting on my kiester, knitting, designing, getting in touch with people I haven’t spent time with, processing thoughts (which I do daily, anyway), crafting, but most importantly, I’ve been allowing myself to do all of these things.  In short, I have taken some time to just be me.

How often do we say we are going to take some ME time? … And yet, we don’t.  We continue in our daily grind.  We do all those things we HAVE to do or we feel a responsibility to do.  Days pass by, weeks pass by and then we have a big birthday and those days and weeks are gone.  We can’t go back and do them over.

As long as we awake each morning, we are given the great gift of a new day.  It’s a day to start fresh and do something new and exciting.  We can change ourselves.  We can think positive thoughts.  One thing I did today was become aware of how good my mind and body feel.  It really doesn’t matter that it took me so long to start eating healthier; only that one day, I woke up with a new idea and actually did it.  I was just sick and tired of feeling sick and tired (love that phrase) and even more sick of listening to myself say I was going to change without actually changing.

For those of you who celebrate the New Year, the anniversary of the birth of Adam and Eve and for those of you who don’t; we all have the opportunity to better ourselves; to work on experiencing more happiness and joy, to be more loving, more appreciative,  more forgiving, more patient, kinder and more acceptant.

I wish you all the best in the New Year.

My family is all about tradition.  Things always got passed down.  It’s been anything from clothing, dishes and jewelry to plants and stories.  Did I say plants?  Well, there is this rubber tree plant that belonged to my great Uncle and my mom always hinted that I’d better not kill it.  Recently, my daughter rooted cuttings from the tree and gave one to her sister so this plant is now part of our family history.

Many, many years ago as my family sat at our dining room table having dinner, my grandfather recited this poem about a funny family with a funny name.  I remember asking him if he wrote this because he had written many of his own poems.  He said, “no.”  He just knew it.  I have no idea how far back this story goes; only how far it has come.  I know a few of the characters’ names have changed and I believe I played a part in that.  The important thing is that the story and essence remain.

I tried to find some clue of it on the Internet but could not find anything so I don’t know the author or if it’s just one of those family stories that was written anonymously.  I only know that it provided a lot of enjoyment and connected my family in a special way.  I did illustrate the version above.

You might wonder how this poem came to be memorized by so many generations.  Well, we were paid. My mom got a fin or finsky as my Grandpa Marty referred to 5 bucks.  I received 10 dollars to memorize it along with my brothers.  My girls got 20.  My neice, Kelly asked me to write the poem out for her which takes the poem to extended family.  I have spent the last 2 days teaching it to my Granddaughter, Gina  and it’s a bit embarrassing  to tell you the amount I paid her but let’s just say the incentive helped her do the deed in less than 2 days.  I mean; word for word she has it down.

Enjoy…The Umpahars.

…always a mother.

(yes, I know this is another post about my girls.  I also know this may seem a bit repetitive, but I found myself in need of writing more.  Just consider this PART 2 of Parenthood)

My daughters always amaze me in that they are filled with beauty, inside and out.  They are unique in their own special ways and continue to bring me such heart-felt joy.

I’m not saying this journey was an easy one or will be without the trials in future years, but right now, I’d say that I couldn’t pick more delightful children.

I am beaming with pride with my youngest getting ready to receive her Master’s Degree in International Organizational Development.  She worked very hard to achieve this; carrying on with her full time job and traveling the world with her studies.  There were nights she didn’t have time to talk to me and certain family events she couldn’t attend, but she made it through and achieved her goal.  The determination and commitment in going after this dream of hers will, I’m sure, play a part in how she handles things from here forward.

My oldest continues to work hard at her job and is raising two fantastic daughters of her own.  She is passionate about healing others, learning more about ways to make the body work more efficiently and takes care of herself with Yoga.  She has turned her backyard into the most amazing organic garden and now has live chickens so she can have a good supply of eggs on hand.  She cares so deeply for those people important to her and carries her joy for life and energy with her daily.

On looking back, I don’t see myself as this Mother Theresa type.  I had a tough time as a young mother and had to work through many obstacles.  My kids had some really rough periods as did I, growing up, but one thing that got us through was this love and respect we had for each other.

Well, I did my job.  I made it through to this point.  My girls are well into their 30′s now.  I no longer shower them with advice or tell them how to do things, unless they ask me.  I have learned how to let them be adults and trust that their decisions; even if I don’t agree, will be theirs to make.  If they screw it up, I know they will learn from it.  Does this mean my job is over?  No way!  They will still come to me for a recipe, to boast about something or another and to cry when they are frustrated.  Like I said, “Once a Mother, always a Mother” and thank goodness for that!

Daughters are angels sent from above to fill our heart with never ending love.